At times we place the undisclosed responsibility on our loved ones to give us the validation we need…our way. How so, you ask? After every accomplishment you share with them, do you have to be told “great job” or “I’m proud of you” in order for you to feel supported, good enough or loved?
When you do not hear those affirmatives, do you silently accuse them of being unsupportive? Do you silently accuse them of not loving you? Do you silently accuse them of thinking less of you only because they did not give you the validation you needed in order for you to be great?
When we don’t get the desired validation from them, we create the stories in our mind of why we are not supported or unloved. In those times we feel heartbroken, an overwhelming sense of frustration, and develop a cancerous rage that paralyzes us from achieving our goals.
It is imperative that we do not place that responsibility of approval on ANYONE! Believe it or not, that can be a tall order to fill and quite frankly, it’s unfair to crucify those who are not aware of what they are being accused of, without giving them the opportunity to discredit the story we have embedded in our brain.
Self-validation is a learned behavior; it comes with practice…every day!
1. Every day focus on your purpose. Remember why you do what you do. The pursuit of the dream never wears thin…it’s when we forget WHY we dream!
2. Believe that everything happens for a reason and expect good things to come out of challenging experiences. Never be unkind to your dreams!
3. Don’t waste your precious energy on issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you can’t control. Invest that energy into focusing on your purpose!
